Goals and Intentions – Episode 244

Goals and IntentionsGet On the Right Track

Setting goals isn't enough. Though it helps us to create a plan, see the future, and stay on track to get things done, there's still a downside to goal setting. Setting and living your intentions allows you to focus on who you are in the moment, recognize and live your values, and raise your emotional energy, which in turn, raises your physical energy. Join us today in

As of this recording, she's still waiting for her retirement date, which is coming up at the end of March 2021. If you're listening to this in the future, start with our first episode of following her journey, and come along with us in sequence so that it'll make more sense. This first episode was titled, Barbara's Amazing Retirement Journey: Section 1. Today. Barbara and I will talk about intentions.

Evaluate Your Goals and Intentions

Barbara really wants to forget the year that was passed except for a few highlights. Just looking forward and in the past, that was a time for them to look at their finances. Throughout Barbara's marriage, they would take the time between Christmas and New Year's to go through in whatever form they had with their bills, their expenses, and would evaluate their goals.  They would figure out what are they going to pay off because their goal was to be debt-free by this time.

So they've been having a lot of conversations about what a weird feeling it is right now that they have done that on the eve of retirement. They don't have any debt. And they've minimized their expenses as much as possible. Now they're at the other side. Both of them have been kind of struggling because their pattern was the goal to pay off.

Goal to Spend?

Now, this shift that they haven't made very well is what's their goal to spend or stay neutral. They want to go places and do things. It has been pouring down rain everyday storm after storm landslides flooding, and it's bleak. There's been a lot to talk about, where will they be at this time next year? Where will they be in October? Because both of them know whether it's a week or a month or two months in the fall, and then probably come home for Christmas, because they didn't get a Christmas this year. But then right after Christmas head somewhere, and that is the discussion.

They don't feel like they have to make a decision right now. But because they're a bit bored and can't go outside. They've been spending a lot of time. Barbara and her husband were always the people that are always saving for the future. And now, they're those people that can spend some money and go have some fun. It's a very weird thing and it's a big adjustment.

Retirement is Going to be a BIG Adjustment

Barbara's husband is constantly saying with you retiring, and not working anymore, not putting money in a 401k not investing. That's going to be a big adjustmentGoals and Intentions for both of us. And it's just a big adjustment in the way you think. So she'd be interesting to know, what have other people done? What have other people decided? We could go buy a new truck? Do we need one? We could buy a travel trailer? What size? Is it better to get a motorhome? Do you invest in something that big when you're not really sure that you're going to enjoy that? Or do you do vacation rental by owner? Or do you do trusted house sitters?

It's just this whole world is available to them. And yet, they still have a mindset of, they need to save for retirement. Now it's here. It's very, very interesting discussions they're having these days.

Barbara's 2021 Intentions

Barbara has tried to do new year's resolutions in the past. It works about till February. And if it's not a habit, within four weeks, it's not going to happen. So she made a list of the kind of her top 10. Printed them up, and stuck them on her bathroom mirror, It's not necessarily a resolution, but they're just reminders that she looks upon, and they're short. But the first one is to be open to new possibilities.

Barbara has been doing the same department, not the same job. But she has been in the same place for 44 years. And it's just time to be open to kind of what's new. She's just kind of keeping an open hand and an open heart about what her life could be this year and just trying some new things.

Find What Sets You Up

For those of us that are entering retirement, don't be in too big of a hurry to jump into a lot of things. But the things you do jump into make sure they're fulfilling and worthwhile and what you want. Because unlike a job where you need a paycheck, and maybe you stick in a lot longer than you normally would, because leaving a job and coming and going has its consequences. When you're retired, you should be able to do what you want, when you want to and, and derive some sense of satisfaction from it, rather than just enduring and sticking in.

Read all of Barbara's blog posts by visiting https://www.rockyourretirement.com/blog/

Mentioned in this episode:

Barbara's Amazing Retirement Journey: Section 1
Contentment in Life – Episode 243
RockYourRetirement Community

This post of Retirement and Retirement Lifestyle first appeared on http://RockYourRetirement.com

3 Questions to Ask When Looking for a Retirement Destination

3 Questions to Ask When Looking for a Retirement DestinationAre you thinking of settling into San Diego for your golden years? San Diego is a worthy option for your golden years. From mountains to beaches, the area has a little bit of everything for everyone. If you’re considering making San Diego your retirement spot, Rock Your Retirement wants to help ensure you make a good choice. Here are a few questions to think about to help guide your decision-making.

What kind of community will you live in?

Seniors have many options when it comes to living arrangements. Some seniors choose to age-in-place and will need to make a few home modifications as suggested by Geriatric Medicine — like installing non-slip flooring and grab bars to protect against falls — to make their home as safe as possible. Other seniors may decide to live in a retirement community, where they can be social and worry less about their needs. If this sounds like your cup of tea, there are lots of options — but the two most common communities are assisted living and independent living.

In an independent living community, you may have a private condo in a building with common spaces and special services and amenities. If your health is a concern, an assisted living center might be a better choice in the long run. Here you’ll get more specialized care with everyday activities like bathing, dressing, and taking medications while still maintaining a level of independence.

What do you want to spend your days doing?

San Diego is a city that is bursting with vibrant life. The city offers options for art, music, shopping, theatre, cuisine, and cultural exploration. Visit the Gaslamp Quarter for history and the arts, La Jolla for snorkeling, Little Italy for craft beer, and world-class chefs. Sports lovers can hit the links at Torrey Pines or watch racing at Del Mar. From museums to hiking, there is a little something for everyone to savor.

But you don’t have to take our word for it. Experience the opportunities yourself by staying in a San Diego vacation rental, such as through TurnKey. You can get the lay of the land by staying in one of the city’s many unique neighborhoods and get a feel for what it will be like living in one of the neighborhoods, finding your niche among its diverse and friendly residents.

When is the right time to make a decision?

There is a lot to think about when making retirement plans. It’s important to zero in on the things that matter most to you and prioritize your needs and wants. Before you move consider:

  • Proximity to family. Do you have young grandkids you want to help raise? Some seniors like the idea of giving their family some space and becoming a vacation destination.
  • Cost of living (especially on a fixed income). Is San Diego a place you can afford with your savings, 401k, Social Security benefits, and any other income you can expect to pull in?
  • Healthcare services. Does San Diego offer the right kind of doctors and facilities for your current and potential healthcare needs? If you aren’t sure, assess your family history and current health. Start making lifestyle changes now — like getting sufficient sleep, getting more exercise, and eating more fruits and vegetables — to make health concerns less of a challenge for retirement.
  • Downsizing challenges. Will the items in your home all fit into a new space or will you need to downsize? Downsizing can be a bittersweet process for many seniors, as Mymove points out. Take it slow, and with manageable steps over time so you aren’t feeling rushed on making a decision about what stays and what goes.

Living in San Diego can be a thrilling adventure, especially for people over 65. Whether you love the city life or the great outdoors, San Diego is a place where you can have a little — or a lot — of both. Know your retirement priorities and immerse yourself in San Diego life to get a good idea of your options.

Connect with Rock Your Retirement for more tips and advice that will help make your golden years shine!

As a senior herself, Sharon Wagner understands that an older body and mind impacts the daily lives of many seniors. She created SeniorFriendly.info to offer advice geared specifically toward seniors to help them make healthier choices and enjoy their golden years.

Contentment in Life – Episode 243

Contentment in LifeWe Try to Convinced Ourselves…

Most of us thought that happiness is linked to our accomplishments. We convinced ourselves that we’ll find contentment in life when we have an ample amount of money or buy those luxury bags, clothes, or cars that we’re longing for. But the truth is that we can create that feeling of happiness and contentment right now, regardless of any circumstances.

Today, Barbara and I will share with you how to come to a place of contentment, in spite of everything that's going on.

You Need to Choose Contentment

For Barbara, she said she is so blessed because there are so many people hurting and needy. I don't need to be so anxious, and worried and frustrated and upset. I need to choose contentment.

Much like those of us that met our spouse, and we were attracted. We fell in love as they say, at least for Barbara it was pretty quick. It was not a feeling, it was a decision. Marriage isn't easy. Being with another person isn't easy. But if you're going to stay with someone for a long time, you make a commitment. For her, she’s making a commitment to contentment.

It’s Kind of Disappointing

As we were approaching Thanksgiving was all of us were kind of upset, because we weren't gonna be able to see our family members. We all shared that each one of us as a couple would be the first time in our lives, that we would just be the two of us. And as those days approached, Barbara was kind of upset. It's like wait a second, we don't get to see our kids and our family.

Again in Washington State which Barbara wrote about it in her 1-year journey into retirement blog. COVID cases just shot up like a rocket ship, and they're still going up. So her children made the call, they said mom, dad, it's not safe, so we're not coming.

But It was Kind of a Blessing

Barbara and her husband could have gone to different places. But they decided for the first time to stay home. It was a blessing to her because usually, her husband isContentment in Life watching football games on TV with the guys. She did miss what she calls the hen house, where the gals in her family were very loud and very talkative. Also, there's usually wine around the island and they're all cooking.

But this time, her husband prepared the whole meal with her and that was very, very different. The fact that was just the two of them, it was so quiet. It was a blessing. But Barbara knows that someday, hopefully, next year, we'll have the raucous, loud Thanksgiving holiday.

What Barbara wants to remember is 2020 was the year that it was just her and her husband. So that fit into some of her contentment as well.

Be Happy and Contented

Remind yourself that the grass is always greener on the other side. Contentment does not preclude ambition, it is simply appreciation, gratitude, and acceptance for the way things are right now.

Read all of Barbra's blog posts by visiting https://www.rockyourretirement.com/blog/

Mentioned in this episode:

A Different Kind of Holiday Season
Writing Birth Stories for Grandkids

This post of Retirement and Retirement Lifestyle first appeared on http://RockYourRetirement.com

Ain’t That A Messy Middle – Episode 242

Ain't That A Messy MiddleIf you are a new listener to the show, we have a lot of back episodes where you can find information that you're looking for. But starting with Episode 239, which was three episodes ago, we started following the life of Barbara mock. This is section one of this one year project, there will be 12 sections, which we will release on a monthly basis, so be sure to subscribe.

Have You Made That Decision Yet?

Today, Barbara, and I talk about the messy middle. This is the place where you have made the decision to retire. But you're not retired yet. You're getting ready. You're planning. you're filling out forms, taking classes, creating your checklist, checking things off, it's during this messy middle. That things start to get real, it starts to get a little scary.

You're looking at how permanent your decision is. This is the part where things can get a little messy at home too. Because even though we might have discussed it with our significant other, when it starts to get real, things can pop up that you didn't think about before. And as Barbara promised, when she embarked on this journey with us, she tells us everything. Remember Barbara promise to be vulnerable.

The Messy Middle

Barbara is halfway through looking back and halfway through looking forward to that retirement. The other day, it's fall in the Pacific Northwest, raking leaves on a gorgeous sunny day. Suddenly, she kind of felt like the changing of the seasons is a metaphor for what she's going through right now. When she first started in the summer, everything was new and bright and shiny and exciting, full of energy. Now that fall has arrived, having wind and rain and leaves flying everywhere, she's thinking that's a picture of how she's feeling right now. And then as winter comes she would just like to curl up with a good book and sit by the fire.

But I'm thinking that spring is going to be my new life. And I'm going to be coming out of this season of the past and looking forward. And in some ways that is exciting. But it's also a little scary because it's so permanent.

Once You've Made that Decision, There's No Coming Back

Once you make that decision, you're going to retire. I'm sure there, you could go back on that, but I'm not. So I know, there's a state certain out there. And I think Ain't That A Messy Middleour listeners, Barbara had talked earlier about a book she has been reading called, Your Retirement Quest: 10 Secrets for Creating and Living a Fulfilling Retirement by Alan Spector and Keith Lawrence. If you're the type of person that really wants to think about and plan for your retirement, not related to money, this book is highly recommended for you.

As each chapter unfolded, it was exciting. It was fun. At the end of each chapter, it suggests to you to answer some questions. What are you going to stop doing? What are you going to continue doing? And what are you going to do that's new? Those are really, really fun questions to explore and think about. So Barbara churned through these 10 keys, these 10 secrets, and then she got stuck. She couldn't figure out why. Because the very next step is to create your plan for retirement.

Barbara's Vision for Retirement

After so much thought into it and so much back and forth with her husband, Barbara finally knew what her vision for retirement is. She's a little vulnerable in saying it but as she said before, she's committed that she'll be open about this.

Barbara's greatest ambition is to please Jesus, above all else. Continue to love and be loyal to her best friend and husband. Full of gratitude for her family and friends. Embrace adventure and travel for the opportunity to learn and grow. Kind, thoughtful, and compassionate to those in need. And focus on her physical, spiritual, and emotional well being so that she can bring joy to others through service in my community. That is who she is and who she aspires to be.

Retirement Is A Messy Middle

If you're thinking about retirement, it is almost like a journal. With projects, at the beginning of a project, you're really excited. You're envisioning this future, but it gets really messy in any project and there's never a straight line from A to B. It's whirling around back and forth. And if you're impatient like Barbara, you want to get to the finish line, you want to get it done.

If you're anticipating retirement, don't rush this part, rest in it, analyze it, think about it, talk to your friends, talk to your family. And at some point, try to get it down on paper, because that means then you're likely to get it done.

Read all of Barbra's blog posts by visiting https://www.rockyourretirement.com/blog/

Mentioned in this episode:

Barbara's Amazing Retirement Journey: Section 1
Canceled Plans Before Retirement – Ep 241
Your Retirement Quest: 10 Secrets for Creating and Living a Fulfilling Retirement

This post of Retirement and Retirement Lifestyle first appeared on http://RockYourRetirement.com

Do Seniors and Retirees Abuse Drugs or Alcohol Out of Boredom?

Depressed Senior CitizenDo Seniors and Retirees Abuse Drugs or Alcohol Out of Boredom?

By: Patrick Bailey, Professional Writer, https://www.patrickbaileys.com

Most Americans cannot wait until the day they get out of the rat race and retire, and many may plan and prepare for this day their whole life. Unfortunately, life’s circumstances may put a crimp in well-laid retirement plans. Life changes like divorce, death, or adapting to a decrease in income can make retirement challenging, at the very least.

For some, retirement may be disappointing — even depressing. Loneliness, despair, and boredom may creep in if the retiree fails to stay actively engaged with others — in and out of the home. Unfortunately, today’s retirees are from a generation that does not reach out for support or help when needed. Many choose to cope with their situation independently. Often the result is unhealthy coping strategies to simply get through the day. It is estimated that 10% of those addicted to alcohol in this country are over the age of 65, accounting for nearly 80,000 alcoholics in the U.S. With numbers like that, this trend is becoming a social problem that warrants new solutions, services, and systems to provide help for alcoholics in this demographic.

Do retired seniors abuse drugs and alcohol because of boredom? Consider the following:

Addiction Complicates Other Health Conditions

There are serious health issues that can emerge from drinking over time. According to WebMD, the tolls of alcohol on aging include physical changes, like the condition and appearance of the skin, as well as risks of dehydration, organ failure, slowed cognitive function, and a weakening of the immune system. Using drugs or alcohol also increases risks for dementia and has a direct impact on heart health. Further research indicates that heavy alcohol consumption contributes to conditions like diabetes, ulcers, high blood pressure, and chronic pain — as well as mental health disorders and memory loss.

Addiction is a Symptom of Something Else

Remember that when it comes to seniors and alcohol or drug abuse, it is often a sign of an underlying condition or situation. Sure, at first retirees may drink out of sheer opportunity or to fill free time. It may evolve into a habit that you engage in when times are tough or to adapt and adjust to your new life. Over time, the impacts of addiction on health and wellness can be devastating. If you feel a need to drink, why? What is it that is really going on? Sometimes the real-life stressors of getting older — including financial challenges, poor health, job loss, caregiver responsibilities, or chronic pain — create circumstances and situations that appear hopeless. In those situations, someone may ask themselves: Why not drink? Dig a little and find out what is going on, first, before trying to intervene. Alcohol or drug use may be a bandage for something much deeper.

Addiction is Easy to Miss

You may think that it would be easy to tell if someone close to you was using drugs or alcohol. The truth is, it is easier for retired seniors to hide signs of any problem as they may stay in, at home, and engage less with those around them. Even heavy drinkers or drug abusers are frequently able to fly under the radar — until an issue related to their addiction arises, which it almost always inevitably does. Family providers and practitioners may write off signs of addiction as being related to age, like unsteady gait or slurred speech, for example. 

Addiction Compromises Autonomy

One of the biggest threats against the independence of the aging population is the risk of falls. It is estimated that around 25% of all seniors fall once or more each year. Falls can contribute to a decline in overall health and mobility due to injuries and age-related complications. Some seniors may never recover from a nasty fall, losing the ability to live independently and care for themselves. Preventing falls is key in maintaining health and wellness; drugs and alcohol can exacerbate the risk of a stumble, tumble, or slip — especially for someone over 65.

Combat the Loneliness

Drugs and alcohol are often a way to cope with loneliness and fill a void in life. In fact, substance abuse is a coping mechanism, albeit an unhealthy one. Many times, the goals of addiction treatment are to teach and install new, healthier coping strategies for when feelings of loneliness — or other trying times — strike.

One way that many seniors have been able to combat fear and loneliness is with pet-assisted or animal therapy. Support animals provide a companion that is permitted anywhere the owner or handler goes — and that is particularly in-tune with their owner’s habits, needs, and schedule. Support and therapy animals are far more than pets; they are often the key to overcoming and coping with difficult situations without resorting to drinking or using drugs.

It Comes Down to PurposeIt Comes Down to Purpose

Coping with the changes that age brings can be difficult. Retirement is often a snapshot of that life change when age commands that you go home and stop working. For many, this will be a struggle. Work often provides a sense of identity; without it, who will you be? Furthermore, work offers a sense of purpose — a reason to get up and get out of bed in the morning. Those that seem to thrive in retirement often have hobbies, volunteering, civic involvement, and, yes, jobs. Retirement may include part-time work for self-fulfillment and socialization.

Intervene with Love and Boundaries

Unless you are a professional, you need help intervening with your loved one. Seniors may feel ganged-up on and resist any attempts to discuss the situation openly. If your loved one’s drinking or drug use has gotten to a point where it impacts your life, it is time to set firm boundaries and, in many instances, an ultimatum.

In some cases, boredom may cause retired seniors to drink or do drugs, but it’s only one reason. A significant percentage of retired seniors struggle with drug or alcohol issues, stemming from any number of potential reasons. No matter what, substance abuse presents health risks and hazards, but older individuals may be more impacted by the tolls of addiction.

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